Monday, February 02, 2009

Groundhog day roundup.

On groundhog day:

President Obama saw his shadow. It's still larger than anyone else's. But house Republicans are still working on a way to cut it off at the knees.

Vice President Biden did not see his shadow. He's standing in Obama's shadow.

Former Vice President Cheney did not see his shadow. He's in some new undisclosed location, and it's one where the sun don't shine.

Osama bin Laden did not see his shadow, for the same reason as Cheney didn't see his.

Cardinals Quarterback Kurt Warner saw his shadow. It still looks like the Steelers defensive line.

Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner did not see his shadow. He forgot he had to have one.

Indicted former Congressmen Rick Renzi, William Jefferson and John Doolittle took a long look at their shadow. By this time next year they may not get to look at it.

Mitch McConnell saw his shadow. It's only about 41/49ths as large as it was just last month.

Former President Bush saw his shadow. And it was much diminished from four years ago.

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton didn't see her shadow. Spring is here, and she's trying to thaw out some of our foreign relations.

Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin saw his shadow. And it looks like Lenin, Khruschev and Gorbachev. The fact that he is bald is the second similarity.

Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps isn't sure whether he saw his shadow or not. It was sort of hazy right where he was standing.

Rod Blagojevich won't decide whether he saw his shadow yet. He said, "A shadow is a bleeping valuable thing. And if I don't get the money then I'll bring six more weeks of winter, and then you'll all be sorry."

United Airline Pilot 'Sully' Sullenberger saw his shadow. And he laid it down perfectly, right where he wanted it.


sandyh said...


Very clever. It's nice to see the sun shine again.

shrimplate said...