Karen over at Namaste' has a post on Things you have to believe to be a Republican.
I won't list all of them, but here are a few of her brilliant examples:
Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Daddy Bush made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Baby Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.
Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.
The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.
A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism.
You will have to visit her page for the rest of them, although I have a couple I would like to add:
1. Kids spend too little time studying in school, but it's good if we steal another week for standardized testing.
2. If you are sick, then it's up to you to pay for your medicine, but if you grow it at home, it's a felony.
3. You support democracy around the world. Unless, of course, the people in a country vote for someone we don't like, in which case you're willing to support a coup.